On the 17th February my family received the news that Mum had another primary Cancer. We had been expecting something to arise around Christmas as something always does, but Christmas had passed and we thought we'd made it. I suppose we're in a better position than many due to this being the fifth time of hearing news like this however it was more serious than we first thought and this time it was terminal. I thought I would write this post for those of you who may be in a similar position for the first time and don't know what to expect or for others who may feel alone or confused. If I can help others in similar situations or those who want to learn more I will in any way possible.
1) It's okay to be scared
It's probably one of the scariest things you could ever experience but you can't let that stop you from carrying on. One of the best things I've ever heard my Dad say is 'Instead of dying, you've got to start living'. I now live by this and it really helps to make a positive out of every scenario.
2) The word Cancer doesn't always mean death
Take my mum for example, she's beat it 4 times! It's the luck of the draw. Doctors and Nurses work their hardest to ensure you'll get the best and most personalised treatment. I only learnt recently that chemo has a shelf life of only a couple of hours and each bag is individual to that person, made from blood tests the day before.
3) Every case is different
Every time someone is diagnosed whether it's the same diagnosis or not, it's different. The speed of its growth, side effects, treatment etc. There's no way one can compare to another so just because someone else lost their fight from the same diagnosis, doesn't mean another will.
4) You realise the real priorities in life
I've come to learn that people have very different priorities. I would like to be at every appointment but my parents priority is to make sure me and my sister go to school. But family must always come first and in some cases it takes something like this to realise that. When it all comes to it school isn't important, grades aren't important, nothing is. It's the people you love who are important. Don't take anything for granted.
5) Friends matter
Friends always matter but times like this they really do. I've seen how much support my mum has received and I really believe this helps her stay positive. Sometimes it's easier to talk to people that aren't in the family but just because they're not as forward doesn't mean they're any less of a friend. Some people aren't good when talking about emotions or they may not understand.
I hope this helps and if there are any questions comment them below or send an email to amyhall1998@hotmail.com
'Instead of dying, you've got to start living'.
Amy x
